Certain things should not be made into Pillow Pets...

Pillow Pets-- a great idea in theory until someone made it weird. Now you can get a pillow pet of just about anything. Here are some examples of things that should NOT have been made into pillow pets...

Category one: Non-Four-Legged Creatures...

                                              This isn't awful...it's not good either.

                                        Eagles have wings...and talons...not 4 legs...

                                             Who thought this was a good idea?

Category 2: Things that are things or things that you don't know what they are:

                                     A baseball. But with legs. And a Mustache.

                                           


                                           Michelin man or ghost? Who's to say?

                                         


                                                 I can't even venture a guess...

Category 3: People; real or fictional. No. Just no.


                                      Any of these poorly depicted athletes:

                                                              Stewie, No.

                                    Shrek is not a person, but you can't say this is okay...

                                     I might have expected this from these guys:

                                                          BUT SANTA!?!?!?!

                                      And Dora, get off your knees and go to school!

Then there is Mickey Mouse, who is a little bit of all of these:

                                                                                      Just say no, Mickey...



Hope you got a laugh, if you did please pass it on! :)  I got all the images from the internet and don't own any of them, I don't work for or against pillow pets or any conglomerates there of...blah blah blah... Here is a pillow pet I strongly approve of:

                                                                   Heck yes!

360 in 365

With the turn of the year January 1st, I did something I had never done before; I made a New Year's resolution.

I have set goals in the past but I rarely do resolutions since most people break them by valentine's day anyway.

So my resolution was simply this: to write more.

When I was a kid and all through high school I wrote all the time, and when I went to college I planned to major in English and become a writer. Life happened, however and with that, I stopped writing. I went through a solid five year writing drought where the only things I wrote were for assignments.

I missed it though, and I decided 2014 was the year of Alley, since 14 has always been my favorite number.

I wrote in January, started Reed, and eventually finished it in early February. When I realized what I was capable of, I decided to better define my resolution to "write more."

I joined a small facebook group collaboration called 30 in 30, whose goal is to write 30k words in 30 days, three times a year. This is similar to the goal of Nanowrimo to write 50k words in the month of November. Instead of only doing it a few months out of the year, though, I decided to really push myself and try to do 30 in 30 every month of 2014.

This is month six, and, in case you are wondering, blog posts don't count. If I am successful, I will write 360,000 words this year. Keep in mind, 30k is only the minimum quota for the month, and if I finish early, I keep writing. I ended off May with a whopping 56,333.

So why am I telling you all of this? Because, my friends, I need your encouragement. I know there will be moments when I lose steam or feel like giving up, and I have the sinking feeling about 3 days out of the month that I am complete and utter rubbish, wanting to scrap everything I have ever written and taking Reed off the market.
I need encouragers, you see.

The second reason is, I need Beta Readers! I am averaging a novel every 2-3 months and need people to read, proofread, and give me constructive feed back!
If you would be interested in helping in this capacity, contact me via Twitter @AlleySaltz or on G+

I know I am not the best writer, but I want to continue to grow and get better, and the more I write, the more I get sucked into the magical worlds I can create with my words.

Thank you for reading.

Alley

T minus one week

Ok Y'all it is only 1 week until the big release of my book.

I got the go-ahead from copyright, I have reviewed what the book will look like on different platforms, chosen my desired marketing approaches, am at the end of my author interviews for the other bloggers who are helping me out, the cover is done and set on, and the text has been picked through with a fine tooth comb.

I can't say I am not nervous, because I really am. In spite of that though I have this horrible feeling it is going to do really well. I know, this should be a good thing, but I cannot shake it and what if I'm wrong?

I guess now it is just a game of wait and see. In the mean time, what can you do to help?

1. From April 18th on, please use hashtag #readreed to help it trend
2. Post on facebook, tweet, text, and talk about Reed to your friends. Once the info is out there hopefully it will spread, help me get it out there! If you have a blog, blog about it and let me know, I will share it on my twitter/etc.
3. Leave a positive review. Of course you have to like it to do this, this one can also be translated as don't leave a negative review. follow the "if you can't say something nice" rule here. Its not that I am afraid of criticism, its just that bad reviews early in the game can make or break a book. If its not everyone's cup of tea (which I know it won't be) that is totally fine.
4. Buy it. Yeah, that would help. It will be starting at 2.99. That's less than most people pay for their morning coffee.
5. Pray for me. This would also be appreciated. Or send positive thoughts, or whatever it is you do.

Thank you so much for your continued love & support!! See you all again with a link April 18th!

Basic rules for divorce

Ok, so after my last post on the basic rules for marriage, I was asked to do something on divorce (for those of you for whom it is too late I suppose?)  This will mostly be suggestions from a person on the outside looking in.

1. Stop blasting your crap on social media: That is annoying. Seriously, people don't care that much, and you are pushing people away and making a fool of yourself.

2. Do not think you can tell lies about your ex: That is just tacky, immature, and disrespectful.  not just to your ex, but to the people you are lying to.  I may or may not know a couple who the ex wife lied and told some church friends she left her husband because he was beating her. This is complete bull. He never laid a hand on her and for over a year after several people were avoiding him for NO reason, but the lie they had been told. If you do not want to tell people (its really not their business) why you divorced, (like, for example, you're a raging whore)say something simple like "It just wasn't working out." (because you're a raging whore...)

3. Do not make people pick, because they will most likely not pick you.  Friends, kids, etc. do not encourage or force them to pick a side.  Do not act like every time they talk to or see your ex is an affront against you and your happiness, it is not.  You may not be harboring a hate so fierce you sometimes think you can move things with your mind, but its OK that everyone else does not feel this way.  I have never in my life seen someone who tried to force people's hand in a divorce situation who ended up being the one who was "picked." Ever.

4. Do not immediately date (unless you're a raging whore): I understand after the pain and rejection of a divorce it could be tempting to get back out there and do it all over again, but don't.  For one people will not take you seriously. For two it is soooooooooo incredibly unfair to the poor sap who agrees to date you.  For three it is super insensitive to the people around you, especially your parents and children.  They most likely love or loved your ex and "moving on" will not be quite so easy for them always. Try to think of people besides you. Aside from all of these reasons, you should also assess your role in the failure of your relationship, grow and heal as a person and move on in a mindset to fix your past mistakes.  I am sorry if you are perfect and your divorce was in no way your fault, but you are wrong which is precisely why you should not be dating.

5. Get yourself some counseling: At a church, a therapist, psychologist, something. Make yourself a better YOU for the world and for others.  Get all the pint up emotions, distrust, and unforgiveness OUT.  You do not want that swimming around in your being to sabotage your relationships with others (both romantic and non romantic).


Good luck in all of your many endeavors, and I hope the best for all of you! (even if you're a raging whore!)

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please do not like every picture i post.

i post crap loads of pictures on facebook, lets face it, Im a sexy beast with a sexy greek god of a husband, and we made some dang cute babies, and Im a photographer, So obviously I am going to be showing this off via social networking. There is such a thing as liking too many pictures though. I dont need to be notified that you looked at my pictures in the form of you liking every single freaking one. I promise. im touched, i really am, but signing on to find 47 notifications and its ONLY YOU LIKING EVERY SINGLE PICTURE is kind of ridiculous, and is making my phone spaz out because you are blowing that sucker up. control yourself! that is not what the like button is for!