"No one would be talking about Robin Williams if he wasn't famous, regular people kill themselves every day and no one hears about it."
This is one of many insensitive things I have seen said on social media today, one of the milder ones, mind you.
You are right, and yet oh so wrong on so many levels. You, social media user who is "sick of hearing" about someone who touched lives here on earth, then left it.
You are right, if Robin Williams was an average Joe, you probably wouldn't have heard about his death, but that is wrong. We should care more, we should hear about the deaths of the many souls lost to suicide every day and we should care, we should cry out, we should be better, live better, and create change because of it.
Because you are right, regular people kill themselves every single day. Sick people, sad people, lonely people. People who have family and friends and people who love them. Depression and suicide is no respecter of persons, it effects the young and old, the rich and poor.
"Robin Williams didn't die of a disease, he died from his choice." I actually saw this on a blog, which shall remain nameless because I really don't want to benefit him with extra "clicks."
Once again, on so many levels, this is so terribly wrong.
Is suicide a choice, yes, technically it is. Is depression a choice? No, it is not.
Someone who commits suicide does so because they cannot see any other choice. It feels like the only choice. They cannot see the good, the bright, the future. Someone who commits suicide is not themselves, they are not thinking clearly, and are not thinking of all the things we all seem to think of when we speculate why a person shouldn't have committed suicide.
Depression is a deep, frightening pit that is difficult to understand if you haven't crawled around in it yourself. You can have people next to you and feel all alone. You feel invisible, or sometimes worse, you feel like a detriment or burden to those around you. It is very easy, in a state of depression to feel like the world would be better off without you. Scary easy.
It's hard to ask for help, and even when you do, it's not always helpful. Some people don't know what to do, or don't believe you, or are critical of you for it, or don't care. People say rude and critical things, or are just completely insensitive and oblivious to how much pain you are in.
Depression is a daily battle, just like any illness. You can have good days and bad days, you can even go into remission and relapse. Depression is not imagined, but entails physical and chemical changes in the body and brain. Science still cannot control it, there is no cure, only treatments, and just like any disease, they are hit or miss from person to person.
Where some people may only require one medication, another may need six. Where one person may get lucky on their first try, some may have to try multiple dosing levels and various drugs to find something that works for them. This is a long, arduous, frustrating process. The side effects can be worse than the symptoms you were having, and many even had "suicidal thoughts or actions" as a side effect. So something people turn to in order to try and curb their depression may be the thing that pushes them over the edge.
I have seen far too many ignorant things posted in the last 24 hours and I am just hoping to shed some light on a situation that is sad and difficult to understand, but shouldn't be ignored or brushed off as an act of selfishness or cowardice.
Selfish people commit suicide every day. Selfless people commit suicide every day. Cowardly people commit suicide every day and brave people commit suicide every day. Depression is no respecter of persons, and their normal "traits" and "personalities" have nothing to do with their "decision" to stop living.
Until you have felt absolutely hopeless, until you have been so in the dark you don't remember what the sun feels like, until you have looked up from the deep slippery pit and seen the distance you had to climb while everything against you tried to make you sink, then don't judge. The pain of depression is like walking through tar, deep and thick, it feels pointless to fight the inevitable sinking. And unfortunately, many do sink.
You don't have to sink, you are not alone, it will get better, it will pass. It's hard to see from the bottom of that pit, but there are people you cannot see right beside you. Reach out to them. Fight. Climb.
If you or someone you know is thinking of suicide, PLEASE seek help. You don't have to do this alone. Call a friend, a family member, go to the hospital, call the suicide hotline, email me (I'm serious) just don't give up.
Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1-800-273-8255
Here is a great music video that brings awareness to suicide, and further illustrates that there is no limit on who depression affects.
http://youtu.be/pUqyoCFqBpA
Rest in Peace, Robin. You will be missed.
